There’s nothing I can write that hasn’t been said. I’m not a poet. But Renee Good was. Was… Till she was brutally murdered by a misogynist racist fucking nazi. Now the government that caused this is gaslighting the public into believing she was a terrorist when the video of her murder is right there. I’ll never understand this evil and how so many can go along with it. How are we supposed to keep going about our lives when there’s so much suffering in the world? I truly don’t know the solution or how to find a balance between living, fighting, grieving, loving, and so on.

Since the Abrahamic religions so many have suffered in the name of Man and “the father”. So many mothers, daughters, and sons killed. And if you are a Black person in this country, it’s even more dire. Now they have murdered a white woman in broad daylight for all to see. No consequences. He gets to call her a “fucking bitch” and gleefully skip away and now children are without their mother. It was never about mothers. We are nothing but brood mares to them. White women exist in their world only to make white men. And so many of us empower these absolutely useless men and continue to allow them to play their pathetic little war games. I’ve had e-fucking-nough.

Then you get online and people on your own damn “side” turn this into some sort of morality debate. They encourage violence or they encourage not protesting at all. I’m not gonna claim to have all the answers and I could very well be wrong but these people encouraging violence are either bots or a bunch of fucking losers sitting behind their phone screen policing people all day. They probably refused to vote for Kamala too. Cause you know, they’re so pure. In reality it’s genocides for everyone now! Thanks guys! I’m done with fucking violence. I want justice. I want radical love. But to each their own I guess. You all can play you’re little war games. I will be here ready to tend to the wounded, the hungry, the soul sick. I want to be prepared to help during and I want to be prepared to rebuild the world we actually want to live in. I refuse to be trapped here. I don’t know what the solution is. I think we all have our roles and maybe your way is a way too. But it’s not my way.

I’ve barely been able to get out of bed these past couple days. Today I think I’ll find a little spark of joy and hope before it’s taken.